Skip to main content

Rebellion


When I was about 17-18 (late teens), I woke up one Sunday morning and I opened my Bible to read. Now, it was during the time when I was very mystical about my Bible reading. Whatever verse I opened the Bible to had a "special" message for me for the day. So I would open and point/look. That morning I opened and my eyes rested on Ezekiel 12:1-3. This is what it says:

The word of the LORD also came unto me, saying, Son of man, thou dwellest in the midst of a rebellious house, which have eyes to see, and see not; they have ears to hear, and hear not: for they are a rebellious house. Therefore, thou son of man, prepare thee stuff for removing, and remove by day in their sight; and thou shalt remove from thy place to another place in their sight: it may be they will consider, though they be a rebellious house. 

I was flabbergasted because I could define my house as being rebellious by the meaning of the verse. But I did not want to take the scripture out of context. So that morning I sat in bed and read chapter 1 - 12. I still felt the message was for me to leave my house but I did not leave. Not until I was 22. I see in me a rebellious spirit that wants to do whatever it wants to do, no matter what the truth is. I fear that because I did not leave then, I may be stuck with a trait of rebelliousness or it may be hard for me to let go of since it is such a practiced habit. I know what I want to do I just have fear that it is the wrong decision.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

My hair and discipleship

Oh man it has been a while since I've wrote in this. So let's start with my hair. Can you tell from the pic that I'm feeling my eyes? Can't wait til I can wear my contacts! Back to my hair! Right now, It's in some mini twists. This morning I washed it with tresseme naturals conditioner (the moisture one) and I left it in all day. Unfortunately, that also did nothing much to retain moisture but create a gel-like hold. The only thing that seems to work is when I put oil in my hair and I pull in back in one . So I just put water, oil and kckt in it from root to tip and I'm going to leave it out and see how my hair keeps the moisture. If this does not work, I'm going to have to invest in a good wig or moisturize every six hours, because this dry climate is going to break off all this hair I'm trying to grow. And yes, I have been watching vids with girls that have ridiculously long hair. SMH! This past weekend, I attended a discipleship training, in whi...
1 comment
Read more

My hair...out here in the boonies

Here's a hair update... So Korean! Look at that forehead! LML! These are some twists on a lazy Sunday Morning. Can't wait till my eye lashes and eyebrow grows back in so I could start looking less raggedy...ugh. LOL But don't my teeth look gorgeous? I left my home in Brooklyn, NY with absolutely no hair products. I know what you're thinking... AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! LOL. My bag was already over weight I was not looking forward to paying another 100 bucks to satisfy my hair's obsession with moisture. I lie. I did bring one thing with me. Kinky Curly Knot Today... A friend gave it to me and said it would be good for my curl pattern. I usually mix it with Aloe Vera juice and oils from Kimmaytube's recipe but I decided maybe I could use it by itself...super wrong. Apparently my hair has to be super wet to use it. My hair was so sticky when I first used it as a leave in by itself. I felt like it wasn't doing any good in my hair. So I mixed it with olive oi...
2 comments
Read more

Die, Chick, Die!

Yeah...problems. I have cried more in these last weeks in front of people than I ever have.  First last week, I cried because I made mistakes. This week, I cried because I interjected in a confrontation between John and Nadine ( my host parents) and I felt so justified but I suppose the Holy Spirit is working in me, or maybe it was self rising up in me but I felt remorseful about my outburst and I cried in front of them again as I was apologizing to John. Poor John. Poor host  family. I believe crying is a response to the books I've been reading about dying to self. But I cannot discern whether it is the Holy Spirit or self that is causing this emotional response in me. But I am realizing the futility of self and it sucks being unstable. In other news, My hair is a mess. I slept on my twistout last night becasue I didn't want to twist them over again and risk more breakage. One side of my head is all straggly and the other side is full and luscious...
Post a Comment
Read more